Every Saturday, one of us will post a blog post from our past in order to let you really get to know us... and laugh at us. Over the past century or so, I posted many a corny joke. Here are some of my favorites: -Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."
-Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam! .. "
-Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
-Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies "Yes, I'm positive."
-Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
-A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
-A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
-These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to 'persuade' them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
-Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)... A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
-And finally, there was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
What's the difference between an Apple worshipper and a PC follower??
PC users admit their PC sucks, and when it dies, it's dead--they get a new one.
Apple worshippers deny such occurrences and pray that when shipped back to Apple for some fixin', it will return just like new. What's another difference between PC users and Mac users???
When breaking, PC users will try all they can to find out the problem and fix it.
When breaking, MAC users cry and send their MACs away to a MAC boarding school and hope they'll behave once returned. (Of course, this can be reversed)
hahahaha, it's similar to the first one, but it's okAY! just poking fun :).
What's another difference between MACs and PCs?
When a PC breaks down and acts funny, the first thing everyone says is, "Stop downloading so much porn!"
MACs just scoff at PCs because like men, they think they have protection. (ooh, double slap)
What's another difference between PCs and MACs?
PC users usually get a new PC by the end of their first year, not only because it sucks; but also, because it's cheap.
MAC users have to wait at least 5 years because they don't have the money to afford a new one and they are stuck with their crappy MAC.
Oh, btw, I use both MAC and PC. Although, I use PC more often, but I do use MAC. I'm just not an Apple worshipper nor a Sony worshipper, that is all :).
Got any other cracks about PC? I'd like to hear them! I just can't think of any right now..hmmm....:) Anyone have jingles about PCs??
Today is the first Monday of the new year. What will you do with it? For me, I am currently working on loans for tuition and hopefully pay for it in time. For many people, the first Monday is the day they return to work and their normal routine. What is in a routine? Maybe you're a businessman, ironing out your shirt and rolling the lint off your jacket as you prep for your presentation. Or, maybe you're a teacher, once again writing the lesson plan on the blackboard (or if you're high tech, you're using a powerpoint). Or, maybe you're a baker, up at this hour as I'm typing this post, already mixing flour and eggs.
Everyone has their life to carry on, and all of this is part of the routine that keeps us going. Is your routine efficient, is it potentially flawed? In a way, your routine is what you have become used to and we don't think about it as much as we get older. It's just a routine, something we're doing to get by. For those ambitious souls who decide to be adventurous in life, they don't have a routine but they have a hard time getting by. So, is having a routine (which will provide you a stable means for life) better than not having a routine (which will be a life lived in the way you want it to be)?
